The Choice

by Lynn

I recently finished the book The Choice by Dr. Edith Eva Eger, a holocaust survivor who at sixteen years old survived the death camps of Auschwitz before being liberated in 1945. I had seen her speak before and remember being touched by her words, words she only came to write and process much later in life. Her own healing journey started by reading Man’s Search for Meaning by fellow survivor Viktor Frankl, who later became a mentor to her.

In a week where we have lost Queen Elizabeth and commemorated twenty-one years since 9/11, it seems even more poignant to look to those who can offer wisdom and healing. Most leaders and survivors have made missteps and errors. Dr. Eger, who is still a practicing psychologist in my native San Diego, is in her mid nineties and is still an inspiration to many. We are so fortunate that she is still with us. Her lessons and insights are raw and on point.

What Dr. Eger recognized later in life is that what helped her get through each day of terror and oppression was convincing herself that if she could get through the day, tomorrow she would be free. This was a seed planted by her mother, who loved Gone with Wind and Scarlet O’Hara, a tough-as-nails heroine she admired. Though the Nazis tried to break her physically, they could not break her mentally. She had a deep inner world that helped her and her sister Magda survive. In my work with mindset, I know that this is an absolute lifesaver for anyone who is going through significant challenges or setbacks.

On a personal note. I have studied the Holocaust under great scholars like John Roth and what struck me most in reading Dr. Eger’s book is how much survivor’s guilt she seemed to feel so many decades later at what she deemed mistakes she made. It is interesting to see how people who have been victimized beat themselves up. We’ve seen this in the "Me Too" movement and other the later post WWII wars that were started with unprovoked aggression. The real villains were her captors and tormentors and the leaders who thought the final solution was anything but pure anti-semitism and hate.

The term "Choice" has a double meaning as it also stands for choosing Compassion, Humor, Optimism, Intuition, Curiosity and Self-Expression. She whole-heartedly believes that choosing and embodying these words will lead you to your own personal liberation. And once you take accountability for your own liberation, new and healthier pathways open.

‘All survivors I met had one thing in common … we had no control over the most consuming facts of our lives … Survivors could continue to be victims long after the oppression had ended, or they could learn to thrive.’

So true. In the end, ‘we can choose to be our own jailers, or we can choose to be free.’ I highly recommend reading The Choice and embracing the gems of Dr. Eger's mind. We must learn from the past and use these insights in modern times.